Yesterday, I started a bucket list, I don’t plan on kicking the bucket any time soon, (although obviously the promise of eternal oblivion will be somewhat of a relief) but I thought that it’s probably about time that I start doing the things that I want to do.
I was waiting for someone to do these things with but she’s not turned up yet. I did have a date last week though and she texted me afterwards saying that I was hilarious, beautiful and that she felt a spark. Well, she must have been sitting near a plug socket or something because I certainly didn’t feel a spark.
(Yes, I did only write that to boost my ego. Someone finds me beautiful and hilarious, ha, take that self-doubt!)
But back to the kicky bucket list. I’ve got some things on there that are standard and that I imagine everyone has on their list. Aka, meet Kate Winslet, win a tennis tournament final and finally be able to accept myself and all of my shortcomings.
But other fun things on the list include:
- Going to Nashville and living my best country music fantasy
- Going to Mexico and spending the full two weeks floating on a lazy river while drinking pina coladas and eating burgers simultaneously
- And staying in a shit hot water bungalow in the Maldives with some blonde lovely who insists on paying for everything
As you can see, most of these activities are holibobs. I love holibobs and I am willing to travel alone, but Christ almighty, is it lonely sometimes…
Sorry, I mean, YEAH SOLO TRAVELLING! Empowering nomad spinster vibes – wooo hoooo! Quick, where’s my suitcase?
I’ve been single for over a year now and a) Kate Winslet has not left her husband to be with me and b) no one else is interested either (apart from the aforementioned date last week, but it’s got to be mutual bbz, though you were lovely and good luck with your cycling expedition).
So I guess I have to do my bucket list on my own – which is fine, I mean obviously this is not good news for my credit card, but what else are credit cards for aside from the impulsive drunken purchasing of long-haul flights?
Hi Jenna, what about me?
Who are you?
I’m the voice inside your head.
Oh hi! I’ve missed you, where have you been?
Well, you went to so much therapy bbz that you shushed me up for a bit. But not to worry, I is back.
Fabulousamos! You can come with me to do my kicky bucket list.
Great, we need to hurry though or you-know-who will join us.
No, your inner child.
Balls, is she still about?
Bbz, she never left.
Shit… Quick, to Mexico!