I am not responsible for other people’s happiness
My breasts are sisters, not twins
I don’t have to put up with bad behaviour from anyone, no matter who they are
Other people don’t know what they’re doing either
Things will never be as bad as you think
Things will never be as good as you think
I am good enough
Some adults still pick their nose and eat it (seriously, I saw a woman parked outside Tesco having a right old pick of her hooter then put it in her mouth, delicious)
Other people’s behaviour isn’t about me. It’s all about them
You’re not losing just because you’re single
You’re not winning just because you’re in a relationship
It’s ok if some days you’re riding the struggle bus
It’s called a microwave because it gives out micro waves
Ketchup doesn’t belong in the fridge
One day the sun will engulf the Earth so if I want to buy myself a new tennis racket then I will, in 5 billion years there’ll be no trace of anything ever so take my fucking money bitch
It’s not selfish to put myself first
You’re never as fat, stupid or ugly as you think you are (unless you are, in which case, sucks to be you)
It’s ok to say “no”
It’s ok to say “hullabaloo”
It’s never ok to say “chill out” (seriously, if you ever tell me to chill out I will put on a helmet and give you a Glasgow kiss so hard that you’ll have a dent in your face)
Peace is found by letting go
Some people die at 25, but don’t get buried until 75
External validation is fleeting and needy, internal validation is self-love and also it’s the reason why I’ve just spent £60 I don’t have on a massage
Losing weight won’t solve all your problems
I have unhealed trauma from my childhood which is why I am drawn to and triggered by narcissists even though they make me feel worse about myself and reaffirm my belief that I am unlovable and will never experience true love again.
Dogs are fluffy.